Ten Years Ago: The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2

Jo Jo Stiletto stands before the Volturi, ready to battle, on whether or not The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2 is a true camp classic.

PLAYLIST:

A Public Declaration on Camp and Breaking Dawn — Part 2
Hello. I am a 44-year-old queer lady from the Pacific Northwest. I’m neither Team Jacob nor Team Edward, though I am possibly Team Charlie. I’m not a Twilight expert nor do I want to be but here I am re-reviewing its final chapter on film ten years later. I’m more excited than I’ve been in a long time to champion a movie and I even made a playlist on Spotify. Stop everything. Eat an edible. Or a whole bobcat. Grab your bestie. Stream Breaking Dawn — Part 2. You’re welcome.

Backstory Part 1
For a handful of speaking engagements over the years about pop culture, feminism, and fandom, I have described myself in bios with phrases like “pop culture public scholar” and “thrill-joy feminist.” I have not read any of the Twilight books and I have only witnessed one of the films in the theater: Breaking Dawn: Part 2. I’m sincere in saying it’s one of my fav moviegoing experiences.

The saga of books and films have already been strongly critiqued by many with bios similar to mine. Much has been said about Twilight’s special brand of feminism, the complicated use of race and cultures, and bullhorn levels of heteronormativity, now even more blaring in retrospect of Kristin Stewart being openly queer in Hollywood. I’m deeply aware that there is no new territory to discover in my reflections but I self-elected to re-review this movie for one reason: I earnestly wanted to revisit the final chapter of this flawed saga not to tear it down but to remember how and why I had so much fun seeing it in a crowded cinema. I had a rootin’ tootin’ decapitatingly good time.

To add greater stakes my mission, dear reader, is to make a definitive answer to a question that has haunted scholars for a decade now: is Breaking Dawn — Part 2 a camp classic? And if it is camp, where does it live on the great queer camp spectrum; Is this a cackle-fest? A rib-busting and bound for a drag brunch parody classic? Or is it a milder but amusing melodrama using a cultish slavishness to heteronormativity in a way that only queers can sniff out and make a meal of? However, before the Great Camptacular Twilight Brawl, I want to put up my own guardrails to try to not be a complete dick about it.

Backstory Part 2
Ten years ago, I remember being delighted to visit the diner Bella regulars with her father Charlie in the early films with my younger sister, putting ketchup on my wrists like blood to be a vampire snack. Tee hee! It was across the street from the mobile home park my grandfather lived in until he passed away in Carver, Oregon. Hollywood tourism right next door and it was tied to happy memories! My sister is such a big fan she went into labor mere hours after visiting several of the filming locations on a trip through Washington. I thought, “How perfect! Her baby is blessed now and possibly supernatural in origin!” I also recall her recounting facts about Bella’s pregnancy leading up to us seeing Breaking Dawn — Part 2 and me asking, perhaps tastelessly, “Does the baby punch its way out of her uterus?” My sister made some sort of knowing look as if to say, “MAYBE?!” and I was like “I must see this.” AND WE DID. I usually shy away from pregnancy narratives, but I had to know how this would be captured on film. I went all in on this moviegoing experience. I went in search of a camp. And I found it. And now I am taking a moment to reflect on that. Is it at the expense of those who enjoy it?

I’m a pop culture obsessive that knew that the Twilight Saga was not for me, but I also enjoyed watching my sister be obsessive over something related to pop culture. I’m tempted to deeply critique this film and Stephenie Meyer, but it’s already been done to death. Fandoms should be a joyful thing, right? I love huffing off that joy others seek in fandoms. I say this as a precursor to this short review. My aim is not to yuk someone else’s yum. Ten years later, all the OG criticisms are more plain to see to even the tried and true fans. Yet, I’ll not throw the proverbial CGI baby out with the bathwater in this review, dismissing it outright because of the author’s intent. In my jabs I hope it is also understood that I respect the fandom and the joy it brings.

LOSING YOUR HEAD
For a plot recap, this movie jumps us right into the action, and thus past all the teenage yearning and self-sacrificing Bella (and the audience) has suffered through in previous chapters. Bella is a vampire now, she has come into her power, and she has a very magical baby that a shady vampire cabal wants to destroy. That fast leap into action is a dizzying first act of a movie with no need for exposition. Act two is an endless sequence where NOTHING happens for about an hour except “witnessing” and “light” racist stereotypes. Then there is a big MCU-style climactic fight sequence on a mountain that is the stuff that queer cinema dreams are made of. It’s stark and bloody against snowy white. It’s both banal and kinetic. It’s needlessly violent and against the ethics of the characters and is entirely a fake out. I recall deliriously losing my own head over that jaw-not-dropping final moment of a final battle of a final movie when it is all revealed to be merely a vision of the possible future. This huge twist ending is probably one of my favorite reveals in cinema history.

But is it camp? I tried pre-reading a few think pieces about the definition of camp to inform my evaluation and got so bored. Camp is camp. Camp is not necessarily in the text itself but what we add to it. Camp is known and unknown, like Bella’s innermost thoughts. Thus, here is the lightning round where I consider the hallmarks of camp classics.

OUTRAGEOUS COSTUME AND SCENE DESIGN
Let’s talk about clothes! It’s very ABERCROMBIE not at all ABERCAMPY. While Bella does get a makeover as a vampire, it’s still all very bland and totally accessible to everyone and therefore uncampy. Also, every scene in this movie looks like an SUV car commercial shot in the Pacific Northwest. Very little about this movie LOOKS campy. With one major exception, the baby Renesmee. More on that later.

IS IT GAY?
Is it campy for queer people to find excessively heteronormative things delightful? Yes. Is it campy for a then-closeted Hollywood actor to have made a career from playing a very straight young person? YES YES YES YES. What else?

The Voltari: GAY. Michael Sheen is the gayest gay scene chewer that ever gayed. His laugh is in the dictionary under gay villain. Snaps also to Dakota Fanning’s single line delivered perfectly. “PAIN!”

The Queer-Coded Vampires That Help the Cullens Because They Were Ostracized by the Voltarie: They are coded bitter gay and are therefore not campy or gay.

Jacob: Very gay. There is a whole scene in which he is revealing a guarded secret to Bella’s daddy who is VERY uncomfortable that a young hot man is about to drop his pants to show him his wolf. There has gotta be a bunch of writing out there talking about how Native culture is “othered” and coded as an metaphor for queerness. Also, he’s in love with a baby and there is possibly something to say about gay grooming here, but I digress. It’s all very messy and very gay.

The Director: Hello he directed critically acclaimed queer movie Gods and Monsters plus worked on the adaptions of musicals Chicago (screenplay) and Dreamgirls (writer/director). An openly GAY man directed a very ungay text. That’s pure camp. The movie is a tap dance in not-so-subtle religious allegory and also a missive on “love is love” and chosen families. It’s both bland and richly fascinating if you see all the layers of subtext of who is making and starring in this movie (KStew, we see you). That duality is camp camp camp. And, also, I’m way overblowing the richness of the subtext. Camp.

“CULT” CLASSIC
In 2022 all our cultural discourse about cults makes it obvious that Bella is the newest member of the Cult of Cullen. The Family. Especially if you watch this as a standalone. This made me as a viewer both deeply uncomfortable but also delighted in that discomfort. Cults are so hot right now. A cult behavior checklist!

Secrets and Isolation from Family? Check. Bella can’t tell poor Charlie what she is now. A daddy of his hotness deserves better.

Changing of Appearance to Meet the Norms and Dress Codes of the Group? Check. Their clothing color palette is very reminiscent of the Rajneeshpuram, the Cullen Clan assimilating to a very specific color scheme.

Food Deprivation? Bella has very strict rules associated with how and when she can eat. Though she is allowed to eat an entire bobcat like it was a whole pizza. Get it, Bella.

Charismatic Leader? Duh. But he’s also kind of a snore.

Is Sex Part of the Group Dynamics? One is not born into the family; one is fucked into the family. It’s very wholesome.

THE BABY
Hands down the best/worst CGI baby in cinema history. It’s absolute perfection. It’s baffling and beautiful. It received harsh criticisms at the time but today it makes the movie sizzle with a chaotic uncanny valley energy. It’s a glorious artifact of CGI being so poor it adds to the film. I understand and commiserate with why the Volturi need to end that abomination, but I also understand why the adorable nightmare must be protected. She’s OUR monster.

IS IT FUNNY?
Humor in camp is either very heightened or accidental. Twilight has very little intended comedy. And, also, not a whole lot of accidental laugh-out-loud comedy (unless you are a mean queen, then it’s probably pretty funny). Yet, I do recall laughing like Michael Sheen’s villain Aro during the controversial final fight sequence. I recall looking around the theater and feeling like I was the only one truly loving this scene. Was I broken? I had to tone it down. I did not laugh out of mockery but along with the joyful audacity, at how things quickly elevate from “let’s talk it out” to tossing heads around like bloody party balloons. It’s supposed to feel like mania and it does. Good work, director Bill Condon. The ending undermines all the stakes of the whole franchise with a vision. It never happened! Ballsy beautiful filmmaking. Everyone just…walks away. The third act was a lie. The end. AHH HAAA HA HA HA HAAAA! Slow claps!

A DECISION.
The evidence is clear: Yes, Breaking Dawn — Part 2 is the most knowing of the Twilight films and therefore the most fun and satisfying. Thus, Ten years in retrospect, as a 44-year-old cantankerous queer, I declare it a camp classic. It’s a 4 out of 10 on the camp classic scale. It’s less John Waters camp and more “Are the straights okay?” Best paired with cheap Trader Joe’s white wine, plain Lay’s potato chips, and a full 10 mg sativa gummy edible.

— Jo Jo Stiletto